so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Did I show you my penis last night?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
