She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
