Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
