I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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