I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize