Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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