I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
