Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
