I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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