For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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