The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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