I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
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