just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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