I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
