shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
