Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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