break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
