New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize