I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
someone owes me an orgasm
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
