just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
