i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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