so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
