just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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