As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
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