just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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