Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
