There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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