your room smells of hookers.
And success
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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