This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Randomize
