BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
