Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
last night I used snow as a chaser
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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