Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
time to smoke my breakfast
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
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