new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i was born a porn star she said
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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