i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
