Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize