I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
