I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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