i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
