I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
