I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize