So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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