with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize