I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize