Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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