i just wanna soil my oats bro
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
