i may or may not be watching the land before time
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
