whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
