We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
