how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
