There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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