i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
